thank u, next

justin was unstable
and couldnt decide
how to have one love
or say how he felt

andrew wasnt right
and i tried to make it work
with deep conversations
but it couldnt last

ryan shouldve stayed in line
only loved him
like a friend
no matter how hard i tried

connor was a firework
the first one i truly loved
will always love him
but dont miss silence

jordan was a child
it shouldve ended earlier
never felt the love
i was supposed to feel

thank u, next.

far away distance

far away distance
not enough
to keep me from
thinking about you

but a twist and a turn
sharp and sudden
didnt see it coming
im as shocked as you

who knew
that something silly
could fix my heart
from yearning for you

a ridiculous boy
who never deserved me
made me realize
i also dont need you

last act of service

Know this,
I do not think I owe you
this explanation.
I do not think I owe you anything,
for that matter.
I am giving you this closure
for the sake of
empathy and moral goodness.
Though, I know that is something
I rarely experienced from you.
Writing this letter will be
my last act of service
for the sake of
you and the relationship.

As your last act of service
for the relationship and for me,
please do not contact me again.

found poetry

i finally found poetry
in you
after all this time
a year together
wasnt enough
until it was over

that last kiss
holding each other
before we ended
knowing it felt different
knowing it didnt feel right
it wasnt comfortable
and safe
like the ones before

i knew we had to kill
the label between us
so i could be free
and find my way again
and rediscover my poetry

your love letters

your love letters
written in soft pencil
on loose leaf from
your grad school notebook
folded and filled
with your delusions
you didnt want me to leave
you have regrets
youre sorry
an offer to meet in person

you dont know
i know
going behind my back
the lies
the sneaking around
lessens the blow to my heart
guilt diminishes
this whole time
i deserved better
anyway

i let you go
to set me free
and ill never look back